I live my life the way
To keep you coming back to me
Everything I do is for you
So what is it that you can’t see?
I first heard of this song when I was eleven, in a music video featuring the men that I never thought would conquer my dreams and capture my heart for as long as I could remember. I’d never deny that I am so profoundly awed by A.J., Brian, Kevin, Howie, and of course, Nick. The Backstreet Boys and their music have impacted my life like no one could ever understand, maybe except for a fan. As I have been missing in action in the blogosphere dealing with myasthenia gravis, between my prayer time and doctor’s appointments, their songs have been playing in my ears.
I had a very colorful teenage life. If the teenagers (or maybe some older people) today have One Direction and Korean idols and the generation before mine had New Kids on the Block, mine had the Backstreet Boys. I remember trading posters and magazines with my classmates who were also boyband fanatics, and two of my closest girlfriends right now actually became my friends because of these adorable boys.
I survived algebra. Let’s face it, not all students love algebra, and that includes me. But when I read from some fan magazine that Nick Carter‘s best school subject was algebra, I became fond of it. Not that I fell in love with it or anything, but enough for me to be able to acquire more than just a passing grade. And I still made it even after I’ve rechecked my sources and learned that Nick’s best subject was in fact, history.
I excelled in English. Aside from being taught and raised by my grandfather who was a part of the U.S. Army in WW2, how could I possibly ignore the way MTV VJs talk? It was my childhood dream to be an MTV VJ, and be given the opportunity to interview the guys and know them up close and personal. MTV Most Wanted, MTV Diary and MTV Ask are my favorite MTV programs, by the way!
Just one song and my pissed-off heart calms down. This isn’t an overstatement. When I got to work in the customer service industry, a lot of times, everyone is upset and pissed. We get that a lot. But instead of smoking, getting drunk, or taking my frustrations out on another customer, I would just listen to As Long As You Love Me or Inconsolable, and everything will be fine again.
Their music is just so… therapeutic. Look, I’ve been guilty of letting all my CDs collect dust in the rack, and so I played them again. Listening to their music just washes away all the remaining anxiety in my heart and I am once again inspired. I mean, it is all more than good enough to be comforted by God through prayers, but there’s always something to be said about a tangible answer to your prayer.
I wrote this in the hopes that somehow, others who are undergoing a difficult situation in their lives could find something that would definitely give a tiny crack in their dark. It could be music, yoga, sports, movies, books, or whatever. It may not be the solution to what you’re going through, but it helps. I guess, what I am to say is, it’s always good to have your own sort of therapy.